As I get older, I seem to get more and more bitter. Not sure where or when it all changed, but I know that it did. If I had to guess some of it is the worldly influence on my life, my own fleshly desires, my own imposed and the lies that Satan fed me and I believed. I seemed to have been happier and less bitter when times were simpler.
Those who know me today would probably have been shocked if they new me when I was in my teens and twenties. I was more patient, kinder, happier, less bitter, more flexible, less angry, and generally nicer most of the time.
While becoming more bitter, I also became more hateful, less flexible, easily angered, not so nice at times, and very impatient. Those things do not make for a decent person. That is not to say that I am always that way, but it sure feels like it at times.
Now I cannot change the past, but I need to understand how it all happened so that way I can change the future. Of course, I am not going to be able to do this on my own. I will need help from the Lord through Jesus to change.
Prayer is the best place to start and that is what I have been doing. If you see fit, please pray for me that I will change.
Proverbs 15:29 New International Version (NIV)
29 The Lord is far from the wicked,
but he hears the prayer of the righteous.