I find it funny that people lie. They lie to protect themselves from whatever or to make themselves look good to others.
It is not so much that people lie to others when they shouldn’t, but they also lie to themselves. What is even more odd is that when they talk to God, they lie to God as though God does not already know.
Colossians 3:9 New International Version (NIV)
9 Do not lie to each other, since you have taken off your old self with its practices
1 Timothy 4:2 New International Version (NIV)
2 Such teachings come through hypocritical liars, whose consciences have been seared as with a hot iron.
My advice is to sit down and really analyze your life. Determine where you have sinned and confess it to God. In other words, be open with God. Admit what you have done and seek ways to change it.
Until you can admit the things you have done that are wrong, it will be hard to heal. Think of the alcoholic or the drug addict. Until they admit that they have a problem, it is hard for them to break the grip on what is controlling them. That is not to say it is going to be an easy life going forward, but at least you will heading road down the right path.
If you remember nothing else, remember this, God loves you and always has. God will not let you down. God will be there for you. God will listen and help in his own way. God sent his son to die for your sins. So I say again, be open with Him.